“An unanticipated or sudden check in progress; a change from better to worse”.
I could write a million stories of setbacks i have had in my young life. Mostly all sport related. But I’m going to write about a setback that i have had for as long as a remember.
My Right Shoulder, has been one of my biggest set backs. Now you probably wondering its just a shoulder? how can it be a setback?.
Now I’m going to tell you some stories, the beginning.
I can’t exactly remember when it began but i do remember every pain, every hurdle it has caused me, every tear i have cried. But for you to understand i got to start from where it all began.
Growing up i fell in love with throwing,( Discus, Shot put & javelin). I was good, really good. I was 11 when i met a man that changed my life that day. i Was at little Athletics and he was a coach, his name is Keith. He saw something in me that no one else did. I remember he walked up to me and told me he wanted to be my coach. My coach? i remember thinking what the heck, I’m a overweight 11 year old, what did he want to coach me for?
He told me he saw something in me, he believed i would make it somewhere, I trained with him but not just for throwing, he began my journey in my weightloss journey. He made me run i lost heaps of weight. but thats another whole story for another time.
I trained for years in my 3 throws. I went to state everywhere, i was the best in my age group. I came 1st in all 3 nearly every time in state, i always came home with 3 gold metals.
and then it began, the pain. the discomfort. the mental games.
I remember going to the physio and he told me to give it up. i was around 14 at this time.
give it up? no way in hell.
I had lots of work done on it, it wasn’t getting better. so i remember the day i was 15 and the pain was so bad, that i fell into my mums arms and cried. i cried for the pain, i cried for the loss, i cried because i was angry. I had to pull out of nationals that year. I felt like a failure, i felt like a disappointment. so that day i told myself to just get up and deal with the pain.
so thats what i did, i dealt with the pain day by day, the pain became my normal. When i started weight training, it helped to make it a lot stronger, and the pain went away for a bit, but as lifting heavy its very hard on your body. i did end up giving up throwing this year as i left school and i feel in love with weightlifting/powerlifting and decided to see where my passion for this would lead me.
Now here i am. nearly 18 years old. 9 weeks out from my first powerlifting comp and in more pain then ever before, only a few months ago i had 2 weeks off training because my shoulder couldn’t handle it anymore, on one of them days i told my mum i couldn’t do it anymore, i told her i would rather be dead then dealing with this fucked up pain. but i got out of that head space. i fought and got back up. had some work done and continued training, got back up and decided that this pain is my normal.
But it might be my normal for now, but I’m going fight for this pain to end. I might never get a pain free shoulder. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to give up. Im going to fight harder then ever and I’m not going down. Im going to fight, I’m not going to give up training, I’m going to work around it, I’m going to fight for my goals.
This injury has been a big self discovery journey, it has taught me to never give up both mentally and physically. Yes the pains bad, yes its shit. But fuck it. its not the end of the world. its a SETBACK and I’m not going to let this setback DEFINE MY LIFE. Not now, and not ever. I’m going to keep fighting, fighting till my last breathe, sometimes you got to be a little fighter.